Hey there neophytes and neopets, I’ve got some news for you today! No, it isn’t that I told your mom about that Jessica Alba avatar you whipped up in Second Life to, um, experiment with. That was a month ago, and I already apologized. Today, sources from deep within the Googleplex have given me the scoop on their upcoming OS. I wanted to share some of the juicy details.

They made me swear on a stack of Bibles, and the first three seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation that I …

So, we were sitting around the Spoofs HQ ™, sipping Daiquiri’s and flipping through the latest threats on the lives of our families and friends (mostly written by Spoof staff members after ‘get togethers’ like these) when intern John came by and delivered news that chilled each of us to the depths of our black, stony hearts.

Apparently, people are actually reading this drek.
No, seriously. From the beginning of the month, the number of visitors to the Spoof Mesa ™ has actually pushed us onto Google as well as Alexa’s radar. …

Honestly Robert, we’re simply too tired to pick on you. Everyone has already pointed out all the facts, and Uncov took all the wind out of our sails by explaining the pain that your recent attempt at self-flagellation has caused the blogosphere.

What’s left for us to do? Call you an idiot? Say that this entire thing is an exercise in link baiting? Make a funny web comic? What, what do you want from us Robert! We tried so hard, I told the staff that since that Furrier thing we would …

Today, Facebook has decided to expand upon its messaging offering, finally allowing users to send messages to outside email address’. To expand upon this new release, we have managed to secure an interview with the only person who could really understand this move — Dereck Carmikal, CEO of Lucky Seven Casinos in Barbados.

Tech Spoofs: Hey Dereck, nice of you to show up tonight.
Dereck: Eh, if you’ve got the scratch — I’ve got the time.
Tech Spoofs: So Dereck, what do you think of Facebook expanding its messaging service?
Dereck: The way …

You know, we couldn’t help ourselves. Out therapists say that it is a problem that we have with taking the easy way out. We think that it’s really because most of the Tech Spoofs staff are just too lazy to find real news. So, here it is.
“I just got off of the phone with Scoble, Furriers out. It’s a real shitbag salad over there…”

Facebook, I would just like to say that over the last few months you have made some real progress. No, I’m not the only one who notices it either. Everyone is talking about how you’re finally starting to open up.

I know, it’s hard. Ever since you let all those people into your heart, you’ve been afraid that someone would use you. You remember the first time you cried for me? That was really special. You told me how much those people at ConnectU had hurt you, and how you …

Hey folks, Tech Spoofs told me I had to write something but I’ve been real busy [drunk -editor], running the conference circuit in search of the newest social media [passed out in O'Doyle's down the street for the last week -editor] all week.
Well what I cam up with was a real scoop from Twitter. For those who don’t know, twitter is like the Enquirer on PCPs. You just sit around watching famous people talk about themselves. Fine, fine you’re on the edge of your seat I know. What did …