I’m glad you decided to come back LinkedIn. I know things have been hard on you since F8. The feelings of insecurity are only natural. Being the Jan Brady of the social networking family has to take its toll on you.

No, please, no more tears. We have been through this. Good, good. It will all be OK.
What I really wanted to discuss with you was your new “addition”. Trust me when I say this, everyone can see right through you. When Facebook went out and got Super Poke and …

Facebook, I would just like to say that over the last few months you have made some real progress. No, I’m not the only one who notices it either. Everyone is talking about how you’re finally starting to open up.

I know, it’s hard. Ever since you let all those people into your heart, you’ve been afraid that someone would use you. You remember the first time you cried for me? That was really special. You told me how much those people at ConnectU had hurt you, and how you …